Saturday, October 18, 2008

Sometimes you feel like a grown up... sometimes you don't!!!

The other day, at work, I had an epiphany! Holy crap, when did I grow up???

Now I found this thought rather strange. I spent almost eight years in the US Army and every day that I was in, I felt like an adult. I had power, authority and responsibility. I did "more by 6am than an average person does in a whole day." I never questioned my adulthood. I mean, don't get me wrong. I still did some very "young at heart" things. Drank with everyone in barracks, threw toga parties you know... good old fun.

So, what exactly made me go WTF??? I am staring at my computer screen right in the middle of inputting training. I was like, whoa, I'm an adult. I have my own apartment, a son, a new car with no car payment, I pay bills, I don't borrow from friends or family, I have a real job that makes a decent income, and I am responsible. For the first time, this year, someone called me "Nelson's mom." Until now, it was always assumed that I was his older sister. I thought that would continue a lot longer. Especially since he is now just 1 inch shorter than I! When did this happen? Did I miss something?

Then, I have conversations with people who are a few years older than me and they constantly tell me that I am "a baby."I am still so young. There is so much time. Then I sit there and start feeling young, not the young like a teenager or anything. Just young. I am not married, I am not in toooo bad shape. My maternal grandparents are even still alive (barely). My son is not even a teenager yet (he will be net year though).

I am always told that I have a "youthful appearance." Or that I am so young. Are these compliments? These older people that say I am so young, are they really calling me immature? Are they jealous? Do they think they are better than me? And why do I find it so funny that at this age, they still think that 10 years is that big of a difference?

Well, regardless of it all, I want to think that it is a nice balance. I am an adult, mature and responsible. But I am still young and have so much time ahead of me. I am at a point where I can go buy alcohol and most of the time not get carded, but still can giggle with the girls about a cute guy! Hopefully, the two sides continue to get along like BFFs and not start to clash!

2 comments:

FOOTBALL MAN said...

I like your blogs, looking forward to your future updates

J said...

:) Haii.

Loved this, can SO TOTALLY relate.

:)